Thanks to social media, we need to update Maslow’s hierarchy of needs: physiological, safety, love and belonging, esteem, and self-actualization.
Physiological includes air, food and water.
Finding healthy food in Portales is my toughest struggle.
Safety includes personal and financial security, health and well-being.
My biggest threat is opponents’ un-trimmed fingernails in noon-time hoops.
Love and belonging includes friendship and family.
With friends and family asking more for advice than money, and late-night HBO, I love my belongings.
Having no exceptional gifts, my esteem exceeds reality. Looking at myself through rosé glasses in bars’ smoky mirrors, I must say, I do get better looking by closing time.
Self-actualization is realizing one’s potential.
Since my loftiest goal was to avoid becoming a wino in a Dallas gutter, I have exceeded my wildest expectations.
In their Christmas newsletter, relatives described me as a “Facebook philosopher, the Protagoras of Portales.”
Despite Portales and I being razzed — with Protagoras chosen for its Portales alliteration — to be compared to a fifth-century philosopher who thought there are multiple sides to issues, and individuals perceive things differently, raises my self-actualization far above Two-Buck-Chuck level.
As a Facebook philosopher who has joined the masses in achieving Maslow’s hierarchy, I aspire to keep pace with the post-Maslow social-media need for spreading wild, undocumented rumors supporting preconceived notions.
Like Fifth Century Man, we are limited only by what our clan leaders tell us — which they learned from even more ancient torchbearers — and talk radio.
When confronted with unharmonious facts, we can reach post-Maslow nirvana of never hearing a discouraging word in a home where the buffaloed roam in the AM range that tunes-out black sheep and coral-reefers enjoying the crime of having a gay old time raining on our patriotic parade by chasing their cloudy skies away with the “delete friend” button all day.
Roll over, Maslow, and tell us what does the fox say?
Contact Wendel Sloan at: