Losing weight one city at a time

By Helena Rodriguez Move over Atkins and Jennie Craig! My new City-By-City diet (copyright pending) is sure to take America (or at least eastern New Mexico and West Texas) by storm and make me millions of dollars (or make me fatter). Life has taken me in a full circle, actually, more like a weird-shaped little […]

Flowers cover mistakes when memories of English class can’t

By Kevin Wilson There are three main reasons a guy would enter a flower shop: A) He screwed up and needs to make an apology. B) He wants to use flowers to put material backing into his affection. C) Both A and B. I was at a flower shop recently, and I regret it was […]

Freshman-sophomore battle one for the ages

By Bob Huber A tradition persisted in my hometown involving freshman hazing at our local college, the Colorado School of Mines. It culminated in a public showing of manly strength in the center of town as sophomores faced freshmen in a mighty tug of war across Clear Creek. You have to understand that few of […]

Johnny Appleseed lives on due to history

By Jim Lee Sometimes Don Criss dresses up like he’s George Washington. This does not necessarily mean Don is nuts, although that could amount to a matter of opinion. As Polonius would say, there is a method to his madness. Criss portrays people from American history for children. What better way to bring history to […]

Sometimes it helps to not understand

By Helena Rodriguez Why do people take it personal if you ask them to repeat themselves? “Huh?” These three letters must be the most detestable sounds in the English language because people flip out when I say them. If you’re feeling particularly suicidal on a given day, I dare you to say “Huh?” not just […]

All types of discrimation are harmful

By Kevin Wilson I fear I may be a victim of discrimination. But before every lawyer within the area tries to reach me, let me explain that it’s a tough case to win. There’s no concrete evidence, and this isn’t based on race, religion, nationality or skin color. No, it’s quite simply name discrimination. I’ve […]

Use the Yankee-to-Brit dictionary

By Bob Huber The next time you travel to England — I’m sure you do every year or so, don’t you? — don’t wait until the last minute to brush up on a few phrases so you can find bathrooms and order beer, not necessarily in that order. After all, they speak a foreign language […]

Every election has its importance

By Jim Lee Those of us in this community who have remained reasonably close to consciousness realize an election will take place in November. But how many of us know about the one this Tuesday? Registered Portales citizens need to vote on this week’s alcohol issue. When I did my informal poll, I discovered that […]

Latinas try to shatter stereotypes

By Helena Rodriguez Somebody said something the other day that ticked me off. I was apologetically five minutes late for an interview. I even called my boss to tell this person I was going to be five minutes late. When I got there, this guy said, “Latinas are always late!” He happened to be a […]

Choose your own adventure in rhetoric

By Kevin Wilson Trying hard to invalidate the flip-flop arguments? Or are you trying to prove that Bush is really turning the corner? Like John Edwards said, help is on the way. What follows is the only speech you’ll need this election season. When you come to the items in parentheses, cross out the first […]