Space missions should accomplish more for the money

Jim Lee I’m confused again. It seems the older I get the easier that happens. This time it’s really getting me spaced out. Well, I suppose I should simply say what’s on my beleaguered mind. OK, here it comes. I don’t understand why we risk the lives of astronauts just to make them ride circles […]

It is time for filler-writers to get their reward

Bob Huber Back in the good old days of my misspent youth (When I became well known for asking President Lincoln’s wife, “Other than that, Ma’am, how was the opera?”) newspapers printed what were called “fillers.” Those were tiny one-liners that came in handy for linotype operators when they had to fill empty spaces. Most […]

Lack of brew makes for a boring Oktoberfest

Jim Lee About three weeks ago I performed an experiment. I discovered that if I droop the end of the toilet paper roll into the bowl and push down the flush handle, the force of the swirling water will pull the paper off the roll. I didn’t check to see if the paper would go […]

In a child’s adventure, dad ends up the hero

Bob Huber When Big War II broke out, every red-blooded American kid who believed in baseball, cowboys, and the American Way shouldered his Red Ryder BB gun in the relentless struggle against tyranny. The scenario involved the building of small forts hither and yon in the Colorado foothills so enemies of the free world could […]

Don’t forget your pastors

Joan Clayton Pastors who respond to God’s call to ministry are special people. Clergy Appreciation Month, which is this month, is observed by affirming and encouraging our ministers. These spiritual leaders are gifts from God.  Pastors and their families live in a world that never stops.  Their workload is large and tedious. Many have other jobs […]

Strong opinions are worth fighting for

We’ve heard from a number of readers over the past few months who expressed anxiety and concern about what might happen to the views on these pages if our parent company, Freedom Communications, were sold. We hope they are as pleased as we are at the news Tuesday that Freedom will remain in family control. […]

While society changes, tortillas stay the same

Helena Rodriguez I was proud of myself one day when I cooked pancakes and bacon for my 1 1/2-year-old niece, Marissa. You see, I’m not a very domestic person, but I figured Marissa, being a human vacuum machine like most tots, would quickly absorb my hot cakes. Well, Marissa gives me this strange, twisted look […]

Eating undercooked meat is not rare

Jim Lee Why is undercooked steak called “rare” when it’s so commonplace? Isn’t “rare” supposed to indicate something unusual? There’s nothing unusual about undercooked steak. A lot of people like it that way, but I ain’t one of them, friends and neighbors. Some people like it downright raw in my estimation. Why don’t they just […]

500 columns deserves celebration

Bob Huber Today celebrates an historic event as memorable as the first three-day federal holiday or the research paper by a German professor named Waldseemuller who snubbed the myth of Christopher Columbus and declared Newark, N.J., was discovered by Amerigo Vespucci, thus labeling us “Damned Yankees” forever. What I’m talking about, without running up flags […]

It’s time to thank your bosses, past ans present

Helena Rodriguez In case you haven’t checked your calendar, next Thursday is National Sarcastic Columnist Writers of America Appreciation Day. Forward flowers, candy, large cash donations and cases of imported wine to me, in care of this newspaper. Wait … sorry folks … I looked at my calendar wrong. Next Thursday is actually National Boss […]